having awakened
at sunup, sprawling gloriously alone
alongside the ashes of last night’s fire
on nameless beaches on far-flung isles

having gotten my bare feet up under me there
and stumbled first-thing into welcoming seas

how shall i now feel
waking here, in a bed,
in a house, in a town,
in the middle of a continent,
people everywhere,
the nearest ocean forever away?

here, where i must walk with measured steps
in shoes
on concrete, on carpet,
on the eggshells of knowing no one
and no one knowing me

how shall i feel?

for i have known the dear company
of whole hosts of friends
and i have had lovers

but i know full well
that this day will be filled
like all the other days these days
with cursory encounters with strangers,
and that i’ll drive this night’s hard highway
just me in my little metal car,
home to my landlocked and empty bed,
and that i shall feel


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